Sometimes I wonder if I’m living with a bunch of idiots.
Two idiots, to be exact: my gray tabby, Bubba Lee Kinsey, and my calico, Phoenix.
They are probably my favorite living things on this planet, but if Phoenix was human, I suspect ...
Sometimes I wonder if I’m living with a bunch of idiots.
Two idiots, to be exact: my gray tabby, Bubba Lee Kinsey, and my calico, Phoenix.
They are probably my favorite living things on this planet, but if Phoenix was human, I suspect she’d be a ditzy cheerleader. Bubba would be a refrigerator-sized meathead occupying the corner stool at the local dive bar.
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Bubba Lee Kinsey is smart enough not to be amused by my penchant for selfies.
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I am, however, judging them by human standards. It is probably unreasonable, due to the language barrier, for me to expect my kitties to understand the phrase, “But I’m TIRED!” when they wake me up to be fed at 5 a.m. I’ve also got to consider that evolution and not sheer persistent lunacy is at play when they act scared of the vacuum cleaner even though it has never hurt them.
That’s why I decided to give my cats a few intelligence tests that are more on their level. I know the entire notion of whether these mysterious, aloof beasts can even be tested for intelligence is up for debate, but I still thought it would be a fun experiment. Here are the results.
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Is Bubba Lee Kinsey smart enough to find the treats after I've hidden them?
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Test 1: kitty vs. blanket
Since there are not many cat-specific intelligence tests out there (apparently these creatures defy logic and explanation), I adapted this one from a test intended for dogs. I figured it would still be valid since both are intended to test spatial reasoning and problem solving. (Please note that I use the term “valid” loosely, as the primary purpose of these tests is entertainment at the expense of my cats.)
First, you need a blanket and an unsuspecting cat.
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Bubba Lee Kinsey has no idea what awaits him.
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Make sure the cat is awake and alert, then cover her with the blanket and time how long it takes her to puzzle her way out.
The first time, I covered Phoenix with a full-size blanket, which proved to be too much for her. After about 45 seconds, I felt bad and had to help her. Fair enough, I thought -- after all, I always panicked when I got caught beneath the giant parachute in elementary school gym class.
So, the second time I folded the blanket in half. And Phoenix curled up underneath it and started purring.
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Phoenix failed this particular test.
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Well, that can’t be good. To be honest, though, burrowing under the blankets of my freshly made bed is one of her favorite pastimes.
Bubba Lee Kinsey, however, found his way out within ten seconds. Good job, Bubba!
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