“For the first time in my life, I didn’t feel envy…”
Tess is the exact opposite of her beautiful, athletic sister. And that’s okay. Kristina is the sporty one, Tess is the smart one, and they each have their place. Until Kristina is diag...
“For the first time in my life, I didn’t feel envy…”
Tess is the exact opposite of her beautiful, athletic sister. And that’s okay. Kristina is the sporty one, Tess is the smart one, and they each have their place. Until Kristina is diagnosed with cancer. Suddenly Tess is the center of the popular crowd, everyone eager for updates. There are senior boys flirting with her. Yet the smiles of her picture-perfect family are cracking and her sister could be dying. Now Tess has to fill a new role: the strong one. Because if she doesn’t hold it together, who will?
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A crowd gathers for the funeral. The church walls seem to strain to accommodate the bodies, but there isn’t enough space for everyone. People cram together, squished thigh to thigh in the pews, shoulder to shoulder in aisles. The back is standing room only.
Not surprisingly, I don’t hear anyone complain. I hardly hear any sound at all except the occasional whisper, cough, or sniffle. Everyone wears dark colors, even kids who don’t usually follow rules or social customs. I guess it’s like that when someone young is snatched from the earth. It’s wrong on so many levels that thinking about it makes my already sad heart ache even harder.
Dad says parents shouldn’t have to bury their children. He says a lost child leaves a hole in the heart of the parents, a hole hacked out with a dull knife. The heart can function with the wound, but it never entirely heals.
chapter one
No matter how much I don’t want to care, it’s not easy being stranded all alone in the middle of a crowded room, like the ugliest dog at the animal shelter. Kristina shoved me into her shiny red Toyota like she’s my fairy godmother, insisting I do the party “for my own good.” But other than a few heys and disinterested stares, no one notices that I’m there. Before long, even Kristina forgets about me. Swept up by her friends and admirers, Kristina leaves me bathing in my own flop sweat.
I begin plotting my escape just as a drunk guy plunks down on the couch beside me and leans against me for support. Smoke and alcohol fumes waft off him and he blocks me, pinning me in place. Wrinkling my nose, I elbow him in the side, trying to move him. He hacks up the equivalent of a human fur ball, focuses his eyes on me, and then grins the carefree smile of the intoxicated. He leans closer, giving me an up-close view of the angry red pimples on his shiny skin.
“Hey, Freshie. You’re Kristina’s little sister aren’t you?” He whistles through his teeth. “She’s seriously hot.”
He’s implying that I’m not and, honestly, I’d be okay with his observation if he’d get out of my way. I take a deep breath, but no words form in my mouth. I glare at him but he doesn’t notice. His long blondish hair curls up at the edges and in the middle of his face is a big crooked nose that looks like it’s been broken or something, but the imperfection kind of works on him. His eyes look like they might have been a great shade of blue before the alcohol consumption hit, but they’re pretty much pinkish now.
Folding my arms across my chest, I push hard with my shoulder, but he doesn’t budge. Other than the brief pant over my sister, there’s no indication he even notices I’m not part of the furniture. I wiggle and push and finally make progress, when he snaps his arm out and grabs mine, pulling me back down. The strength in his arm is deceptive for such a skinny guy.
“What’s she like?” Drunk Pimple Guy stares at her, his voice dripping with the kind of reverence people save for the very famous or very beautiful. Far as I know, Kristina isn’t famous outside of Great Heights, but even I can’t deny she has the beauty part down.
Breathing deep, I try to shake him off but he doesn’t let go. Propelled by growing humiliation, I decide to give him some truths. “She burps. Red meat gives her gas and she won’t eat anything that contains a carbohydrate. Oh, and she ta
