Wrestling

In the thread where the Muscle Buster is battling the Stone Cold Stunner for finisher dominance, there was a lively discussion about burials and rather or not Austin buried other wrestlers. When it comes to the topics of burials, Stone Cold Steve Austin is usually not the first person to come to mind for some wrestling fans. The term itself has become widespread and popular with the IWC, because we know everything there is about the wrestling industry and can do TNA's job better than they can. One of those things in the last sentence is probably true. So let's do it, let's talk about burials in pro wrestling. There is one man and one man only, who is always present in every burial that has occurred in pro wrestling. I think we all know who I'm talking about. None other, than the Undertaker. We all should have seen it coming. He was the Undertaker, he was obsessed with corpses and funerals and had some fat, pale guy with him carrying an urn. We should have known from when he first stepped out onto television. This man was here to bury other pro wrestlers. Sure, it all seemed innocent enough, a casket match here and there every once in a while. But underneath was the sinister urge to bury pro wrestlers, effectively ending their prosperous careers. He of course, would then bill the families for the funerary services he rendered. The first burial in pro wrestling took place on October 20, 1996. The person to be buried was Mankind. Evidently burying one wrestler wasn't enough, the Undertaker wanted to bury the entire species. Who could stop this madman and his evil schemes? He has supernatural powers! Those powers were used in the work of evil and Mankind was the first pro wrestler to ever be buried. Mankind's wife, who is still looking for him in Cleveland, says that her husband was a good man. She continued, "you might even say, he was a kind man." If there was anyone who didn't deserved to be buried live on PPV, it was certainly this lovable husband and father. Not satisfied with his perverse need to fulfill his gimmick requirements, the Undertaker attempted a second burial on December 13, 1998. This time, against the opponent of Stone Cold Steve Austin. In an ironic twist of fate, Austin managed to turn the tables on the demon. The Undertaker became the second wrestler to ever be buried in pro wrestling history. This obviously did not sit well with the "Phenom" as the Satan worshiping kids call him. The Undertaker would return with the Big Show and successfully bury the Rock and Sock Connection on September 9, 1999. This would make it the second time that Mankind has been buried on PPV. Why no one has ever thought to call the police to arrest this monster, has yet to be explained. There was a brief period of quiet on the burial front as the Undertaker was replaced by an alien who thought Limp Bizkit music was cool and badass. Upon seeing this nu-metal crap in his company, Vince McMahon had no choice. On November 16, 2003, Vince McMahon buried this bizarre creature and killed it for good. He was then hailed as a hero in both the wrestling industry and the music industry, as Limp Bizkit's career as rock stars were seemingly buried with it. Unfortunately, the real Undertaker returned to start is reign of burial terror anew. However it was not meant to be. Kane managed to bury his own brother on October 24, 2010. It was also broadcast on PPV. Fortunately, no one saw it because no one was watching wrestling anymore. Fans had a difficult time seeing their top wreslter John Cena and Randy Orton is boring. That was the last burial. No professional wrestler has ever been buried since. When you add it all up. No one in the wrestling industry has been buried more than the Undertaker with Mankind coming a close second. Still, the Undertaker remains the most buried wrestler in the history of the world. What an abysmal and uneventful career he must have had. This op-ed has been written and is sincerely signed by, Tyrion Lannist

Rob speaks to British Wrestling legend Nigel McGuinness and gives his thoughts on Extreme Rules.

The best part about Ryback's ambulance shtick? Every time I hear the sirens, I invariably think, "Holla! If ya' hear me!" I know all the cool kids have been rallying for John Cena to turn heel over the past several months and I'm kinda okay with him being the promotion's top babyface. He's the perfect guy for the job and to be honest, he's been on this current path for so long, I'm not convinced he could go back with any degree of success. The fans who still like him would probably reject it and the smarks would nitpick him to death. What's frustrating is that John Cena could be a great character if WWE had an inkling of trust. But they don't trust their own creative team, nor do they trust the vaunted "Universe." After all, Vince knows what the fans want better than the fans do. Right? When I first heard Cena's pre-match bologna for WrestleMania, about the personal and professional crises he had after losing to "The Great One" back in 2011, how his life unraveled and he couldn't win a match, I thought, "Wow, now there is a compelling storyline that would have been a home run." But it never happened. That's one of the sacrifices you have to make when your in-ring persona mirrors your public image. Cena is a fixture for Make-a-Wish and a bunch of other feel-good endeavors, so having him be the evil Kal-El from Superman III for an entire year ain't happening. But to play Superman against Ryback? No excuses. Maybe WWE thinks the Cena fans will cheer him less if he becomes vulnerable, but I don''t think that's true. They'll probably cheer him more. I used the Superman reference because this reminds me of the early 90s when the Superman comics were bleeding DC dry. Seriously, you couldn't give them away. Why? Everyone still loved Superman, but it was the same old story. Clark is dicking around at the Daily Planet, Lois isn't giving it up, something catastrophic happens, Supes flies in -- but wait, oh noes, he's in danger -- oh nevermind, he came back and won because he's Superman. Repeat ad nauseam. Then DC went and killed him (War Doomsday!) and the comic was so hot they reprinted the damn thing like three times over and "the man of steel" was back on top. Sure, they eventually bungled it, much like WWE bungled the Invasion, but it proved that people like their heroes vulnerable. It makes them more relatable and quite frankly, less boring. Now, I'm not suggesting Ryback kills John Cena at next month's Payback pay-per-view (PPV), but it sure would have been nice to see him lay down for the big galoot when the situation called for it. Why should I care about this feud if you can't convince me that Ryback can actually win? The ambulance is a great prop when you use it correctly. At Extreme Rules, it was wasted (see why here) and WWE continues to try to play both sides and book everyone to look strong. It's like that bullshit in my town's junior soccer league, where everyone gets a trophy and everyone is a winner. Why? Because they are scared to death to let anyone feel like a loser. Losing builds character folks, as does failing. WWE doesn't trust its audience enough to put John Cena down during a program. I don't care if he comes back and wins, but goddamn it, make him earn it. Make me care. If you don't want to do it for the fans, do it for Ryback. With CM Punk gone, he's the top heel right now, let's keep him there. He happens to be doing a pretty good job. Take into consideration how long he's been around and how green he still is. Also consider how rushed his heel turn was due partly to Punk's hiatus. He's definitely trying and I see steady improvements. Ryback can lose and still look strong, but that requires John Cena to meet him halfway. (cue sirens) He'll have that chance on June 16, but I'm not getting my hopes up.

Impact Wrestling Results By Bill Pritchard for Wrestlezone.com May 23rd 2013 Hulk Hogan starts the show by saying how great it is to be home, then he plugs his Hogan's Beach restaurant and says they make him feel like family. He says this is his home, but they also have a TNA family, and AJ Styles looks like he is crossing to the dark side. Hulk says AJ is defecting to the Aces and Eights, but he wants some positive vibes and he wants to bring out someone on his side. Sting makes his way to the ring and Hulk says he's in charge, and he doesn't have to be banned from title shots if he doesn't want to. Sting says Hulk should keep things the same, and he wants it this way because he told Hulk to trust Bully Ray. Sting says he is going to take the power and the title from Bully, and he only needs one shot to get things done at Slammiversary. Hulk tells him again that he could get rid of the stipulation, then Brooke Hogan comes out and says neither one of them should take the blame. She says she fell for Bully and she drove a wedge between them, and she also strained her relationship with her dad too. Hulk tells her it's not necessary but Brooke says it's her fault, and as much as she loves the Knockouts and her job, she needs to resign. Hulk says she doesn't have to do that, then the Aces and Eights theme cues up and Bully Ray makes his way through the crowd. Bully tells them to shut up, and he asks why they are taking the blame for everything because it's his fault that he stabbed them in the back. He says he runs the show, not Hulk, but he does have to blame one person, and that's Brooke because he still thinks of her and the connection they have. Bully says he still loves her and always will, and he will never take his wedding ring off, then he holds up his hand and leaves through the crowd. Joey Ryan vs Petey Williams vs Suicide Suicide dropkicks Ryan outside and puts Petey in an underhook submission, then he goes for a pin before Petey charges him in the corner. Suicide avoids a dive and does a headstand on the turnbuckles, then Petey trips him and throws him outside just as Ryan surprises Petey with a suplex. Ryan taunts the crowd but Suicide drops him with a hurricanrana, then he puts Ryan in a STO variation while also putting Petey in a headlock. Petey fights out and sends him to the mat, then he calls for a Canadian Destroyer but Ryan breaks it up and tries to throw Suicide outside. Suicide holds onto the ropes as Petey dives on Ryan on the floor, then Suicide jumps on them both from the top turnbuckles. Suicide rolls Ryan in and Petey tries to legdrop him, but Ryan avoids it so he goes for a powerbomb on Suicide but he gets rolled up for a near fall. Petey goes for another Destroyer but Ryan kicks him in the face, then Suicide knocks him down with a crossbody before ending it with an inverted double underhook gutbuster. Winner - Suicide Chris Sabin is shown greeting James Storm, and he hears Storm needs a tag partner and they were part of two of the best teams in history. He says they should get together, but Storm says as much as he appreciates it, he can't let him do that. Storm says he could become the X Division champion and trade it in for a World title shot, and he can't get in the way of it. Sabin says he gets where he's coming from, then they shake hands and Sabin leaves the locker room. We get back from a commercial to see Brooke Hogan running up to Bully Ray and asking what he meant before, and Bully says yes, he still loves her. We cut to Mickie James and Velvet Sky talking about her match tonight, and Mickie wants to make sure Velvet can wrestle tonight. She says she can go to Brooke and have the match postponed, but Velvet says she's ready and she doesn't want Gail Kim to get away. Mickie says OK and says she'll see her out there, then they hug and Mickie leaves as Velvet continues to get ready. We a

Get your weekly dose of Knockouts action on tonight’s Impact. Tune in to Spike TV at the start time of 8pm ET. Discuss the show in the comments!

As any close follower of WWE history knows, Vince McMahon has a habit of taking real life worries and turning them into storyline fodder. The latest example of this trait is Triple H becoming woozy and almost passing out in the main event of the May 20th episode of Monday Night Raw against the newly repackaged Michael McGillicutty, Curtis Axel. Indeed, this was clearly an angle to kickstart a storyline where Hunter is out of action with post concussion syndrome due to Brock Lesnar's sledgehammer shot to the jaw at the Extreme Rules pay-per-view on Sunday. Head trauma has suddenly become a major concern to WWE management after Dolph Ziggler suffered the worst concussion of his career and retrograde amnesia from an errant kick by Jack Swagger at the Smackdown tapings on May 7th, 2013. WWE has already responded by giving a $1.2 million donation over three years to Chris Nowinski's Sports Legacy Institute to help fund their research into Chronic Traumatic Encephalopathy (CTE), a progressive degenerative brain disease that both the late Chris Benoit and Andrew "Test" Martin were diagnosed with postmortem. The performers at Extreme Rules were also told to keep the risks to a minimum and avoid blows to the head because they don't want a repeat of what happened to Ziggler. Thus, this concussion angle could be an attempt to educate the WWE audience about the dangers of head trauma and prepare them for a toned down, safer, in ring style. As Dave Meltzer revealed in this week's subscriber only Wrestling Observer Newsletter, it's also a way to reintroduce the McMahon family soap opera to our screens, a favourite old chestnut of the WWE creative team when they are running low on new, innovative ideas: "Regarding the HHH angle, apparently the working idea is to lead to Stephanie, Vince (and perhaps even the kids) going on television and begging HHH to stop wrestling for fear of the damage it has already caused him. As of right now, one story we were told is that several family members will be on television when it comes time for his return. However, another source said there are several different ideas and nothing is certain on where the angle is going." It's unsurprising that they haven't mapped out a finish to the angle that they've just shot. The obvious idea would be to build to yet another rematch with Brock Lesnar, but that feud has been done to death already by now. So who knows where this will go, other than this storyline will obviously lead to a much hyped in ring return and possibly his retirement match at WrestleMania 30. I don't have high hopes for this serious concussion storyline, as whenever similar ideas have been done in the past, they've always fallen flat, partly because fans want feel good entertainment from invincible superheroes, not to be constantly reminded of the stark dangers that the performers face when they step into the squared circle. We've been here with TNA before when their creative team had concussions on the brain after Mr. Anderson suffered a serious one from a reckless chair shot to the back of the head by Jeff Hardy. That genuine injury was sewn into the company's main plot, but babyfaces Matt Morgan and Mick Foley telling Ken about the Sports Legacy Institute's work and encouraging him to take time off whilst heel Eric Bischoff tried to force him back into the ring ASAP, only managed to bore and confuse their viewers. It was also hypocritical, as TNA mishandled Anderson's concussion leading to a longer layoff than he should have required and the promotion was simultaneously refusing to pay the medical bills of performers who had sustained serious concussion issues while working for them, like Shannon "Daffney" Spruill. More recently, fans at Ring Of Honor's May 5th television tapings booed when Nigel McGuinness announced that Paul London wouldn't wrestle on the show due to suffering a genuine concussion the prior night from a misplaced top rope double foot stomp to the head by Davey Ric

!BANG! TV Report – Jerry “The King” Lawler Returns to the Ring in Ocala, Florida From the Ocala Star Banner – John Patton Correspondent. Dory Funk Jr. and Jerry “The King” Lawler’s thoughts and feelings on Jerry’s Return to the Ring on !BANG! TV. Comments from Jerry Lawler’s Doctor. Jerry Lawler’s comments on his recovery and how it brought millions of people together. Jerry “The King” Lawler’s Return to the ring will be a memorable night for wrestling fans around the world. Ocala Star Banner Story: http://www.ocala.com/article/20130523/ARTICLES/130529924 Tickets to see Jerry “The King” Lawler’s Return to the ring are now online at http://www.dory-funk.com or you may call for ticket information – 352-895-4658 If you would like to become a professional wrestler and appear on !BANG! TV Call Now 352-895-4658 or Visit Dory Funk’s Website at http://www.dory-funk.com Join Dory Funk and Marti on Twitter, Facebook and Youtube – http://www.dory-funk.com/bt-20.html Visit Dory Funk’s Website at http://www.dory-funk.com Join Dory Funk and Marti on Twitter, Facebook and Youtube – http://www.dory-funk.com/bt-20.html

Former WWE and TNA wrestler Matt Hardy recently spoke with WrestlingINC on his current run with Ring of Honor Wrestling, how that deal came to be, and much more. Working with Adam Cole during his initial feud: "...in December I started my storyline arc with them that was kind of going to go from December to Wrestlemania originally with Adam Cole, which has been a blast. It's one of the funnest things I've done in my career and maybe now I just enjoy stuff a little more than I did before. I really love this. Adam Cole, can't say enough about him. He's 22, maybe he's 23 now. He's so far ahead of the curve as far as an athlete and his mentality and his promos, the way he carries himself and it's been a lot of fun to work with him." On the rest of the roster, and ROH Fans: "...I see a couple things I can give here, maybe fundamentally. I definitely can't make these guys better athletes or more exciting than they are, because they're great. They're young, they're healthy and they're driven and I know just what their passion is about. It's been a blast working with Ring of Honor, especially being a heel, the particular way I've been a heel, because I don't really have to be a fake, phony heel. I just get to be me and they dislike me because I'm me. That makes my job easy, but it also makes it very fun." The potential of a WWE or TNA return: "If something came along with TNA or WWE where it could be some sort of part time gig where I thought I would be healthy and happy - and with saying that, I'm not some sort of star like Stone Cold or Shawn Michaels or Undertaker that can command a schedule like that - I just know I need to be realistic with myself. I've been very blessed. I've made a lot of money in the business. I'm financially secure and set for life. I do this because I love it. If something worked out where it would help both sides, I would definitely be open to it. But I'm not just going to put myself through a strenuous effort because I've done that and I'm past that. At this age now, I know what my limits are and I want to make sure that first and foremost, Matt Hardy the person is happy and healthy."

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE LA GUERRA IS COMING TO NEW YORK CITY! BROOKLYN, NY (May 22nd, 2013) – Mexico and Puerto Rico have a deep and rich history in the sport of professional wrestling. They have helped introduce the World to the lucha libre style of wrestling and on June 8th, the eve of the Puerto Rican Day Parade, Warriors of Wrestling presents the talent of Fighting Spirit Wrestling along with Amaro Productions as we pay tribute to the Latino wrestling community with “La Guerra”. This extraordinary event will take place at The Elmcor Center located at 107-20 Northern Boulevard in Corona, Queens, NY. Talent scheduled to appear are: BLUE DEMON JR., DAMIAN 666, BESTIA 666, CHICKY STARR, EXTREME TIGER, SAVIO VEGA, IVALESSE VELEZ, APOLO, CHRIS MASTERS, BRIAN CAGE, THE S.A.T., DANNY DEMANTO, JOKER, THE SNOT, MATT HAMMET, HOMICIDE, BANDIDO JR., JOE ETTELL, SLICK WAGNER BROWN, WHIPLASH, TALON, LOS FANTASTICOS, EYFBO, RICKY CRUZ, NORIEGA, AND MORE! The following matches have already been signed for this event: INTERNATIONAL TRIOS MATCH (LUCHA LIBRE RULES) Former WWE Superstar Savio Vega, (PR) vs. Blue Demon Jr. (MEX) & Los Fantasticos (Sensational Carlitos & Fenomino BJ) (PR) vs. Former WWC Tag Team Champions Los Maximos (Joel Maximo & Wil Maximo) (US) CLASH OF THE TITANS Former WWC Campeon de Universal “El Leon” Apolo (PR) vs. Former WWE Superstar “The Masterpiece” Chris Masters (US) FIRST EVER INTERNATIONAL FIVE STAR MATCH Slick Wagner Brown (US) vs. Ricky Cruz (PR) vs. Noriega (PR) vs. Member of The SNOT “The American Nightmare” Logan Black with Joey B (US) vs. “The Machine” SV Shields (US) PUERTO RICO VS. THE UNITED STATES “Mr. 450” Matt Hammett (PR) vs. FSW Primero Champion Talon (US) THE UNITED STATES VS. MEXICO Brian Cage (US) vs. AAA Star Extreme Tiger (MEX) MEXICO VS. PUERTO RICO Bestia 666 (MEX) vs. Hiram Tua (PR) THE UNITED STATES VS. PUERTO RICO “Indestructible” Joe Ettell (US) vs. “Electric” Syler Andrews (PR) INTERNATIONAL TRIOS MATCH (LUCHA LIBRE RULES) Chicky Star (PR) & EYFBO (FSW Heavyweight Champion “The Funky Monkey” Angel Ortiz & “The Real Deal” Mike Draztik) (US) vs. Damian 666 (MEX), Joker (US), & “Supastar” Whiplash (US) PUERTO RICO VS. THE UNITED STATES Bandido Jr. (PR) vs. “The Cold Hearted Playa” Danny DeManto (US) In addition, from 6:00pm-7:00pm fans will be invited to a special meet and greet with the talent. Bell time is set for 7:30pm, starting with the pre-show. Doors will open for the event at 6:00pm. Tickets start at $10 for children, $20 for General Admission and $30 for Front/Second Row so bring the whole family. Tickets can be purchased online at www.TheLudusWrestlingCenter.com or by visiting The Ludus Wrestling Center located at 576 3rd Avenue in Brooklyn, NY. For more information call (347)-677-7236, visit us at Facebook.com/FightingSpiritWrestling or on Twitter @FSWLUDUS. Card is subject to change.

Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson updated his Twitter account earlier today, posting a photo of himself with his cousin, Tamina Snuka. The Rock surprised the WWE Diva with a brand new SUV. Just surprised my cousin @taminasnuka w/ an SUV. Amazing woman w/ a heart of gold. F'n awesome. #Love twitter.com/TheRock/status… — Dwayne Johnson (@TheRock) May 23, 2013 LINK: Check out the official trailer for The Rock's new reality show on TNT, The Hero!